Trust in the Lord

This morning I had a very strong, distinct impression not to post
what I have already written but to share what I have been
learning in the past 6 months. It is extremely personal and I try
share it as discreetly as possible. I hope it will stimulate your
thinking and understand trust from an eternal perspective.

Four months ago, I had to make a very difficult decision
resolving a dilemma. I was super happy and excited feeling it
was a sheer bliss until the Lord’s will led me to a different turn.
So, I dropped it and went on with life but that didn’t feel right
either. After 4 months of tossing and turning at night, I once
again come up with a new solution and finally feel at peace.

Well, as difficult as the situation seems, my growth has been
tremendous and I begin to see the skills, attributes I’ve
developed over time. Sometimes I think of answers to prayers
like a light bulb, very “answerish”, but this is different. I cried
(many many times), thought through every possible solution,
and in the end chose to act upon my best judgment then
patiently waited for the confirmation.

It took a whole 4 months to regain my inner peace but
meanwhile some great friends’ care has become the an aid, a
perfect answer to my prayers. Heavenly Father keeps sending
friends whom I trust and can confide in to check on me. These
conversations have given me much comfort and inspired me to
take the leap of faith.

The exact direction I was hoping to receive never came.
The sacrifice I knew I had to make still needs to be made.

The unknown future remains uncertain.

But I’ve gained something far more valuable.

I’ve learned that courage means staying calm to work things out
when every bit of my fear tells me to jump ship.

I’ve learned that the use of agency requires me being
dependent and independent on the Lord.

I’ve learned that faith, hope, and charity are like a tripod and I
can’t just pick one to have.

I’ve learned that having faith and trust in the Lord doesn’t mean
knowing all the possible outcomes but following even if I can’t
see.

“It is not easy to go without—without physical gratifications or
spiritual assurances or material possessions—but sometimes we
must since there is no guarantee of convenience written into
our Christian covenant. We must work hard and do right, as
Abraham Lincoln said, and sometimes our chance will come.
And when we’ve tried, really tried, and waited for what seemed
never to be ours, then “the angels came and ministered unto
him.”” – Elder Jeffrey R. Holland


K.D.