Peace be still

Two weeks ago I had the opportunity to give a talk at Stake Conference. My topic  was based on the scripture found in D&C 101:16, “…be still and know that I am God.” While I was doing research, I found a wonderful talk by Erin D. Maughan “Be Still and Know God” http://speeches.byu.edu/?act=viewitem&id=1849. This talk has helped me to understand the meaning of being “still” and “know” God. There is one part that I did not share during that night and I would like to share it here.

Remember the story of how Jesus calmed the storm? Jesus and His disciples entered into a ship. After a while a storm came and waves were beating, probably those people on the ship feels like they are on the pirate ship in an amusement park, going up and down. The disciples were afraid, so they went and awoke Jesus. What happened next was, the coolest thing I read in the bible, Jesus “arose and rebuked the wind, and said unto the sea, ‘Peace be still.’” (Mark 4:39). Of course, we can’t miss one of the most awakening questions, “Why are ye so fearful? How is it that ye have no faith?”

Our lives are full of storms, anytime, anywhere. These storms won’t call you and say, “hey, I am coming, be ready!” Most of the time we can’t ward off and sometimes these storms hit us right on our head. 

Let us remember three things that we can learn from this story. First, Jesus was with the disciples when the storm came. I am 1000% sure that He is with us when we are trying to overcome challenges, difficulties and struggles in our lives. We are not alone in our lives’ battles.

Second, the disciples went to the Master and asked for help, even though they were afraid to dead. Yes, we also need to ask for help. We tend to over-thinking and over-worrying on the problems in front of us. Sometimes we are panic in what’s happening in our lives. We need to be humble and go to the Lord and tell him that “the storm is here! Please help!” 

Third, and the most powerful part of this story, is when Jesus stretched forth His hand and calmed the storm. When he said “peace be still”, He did not just calmed the storm, He also calmed the souls of the disciples, and He also can calm your mind and soul.

Life is full of lemon, bitter melon, Chinese herbal tea and salty licorice. When tough times come, it’s okay to be fearful, and letting your faith to be shaken for a little bit. But remember, as the Lord said in D&C 101:16, “…let your hearts be comforted…for all flesh is in mine hands; be still and know that I am God.” Even though the Lord may ask us why we are fearful and have no faith, the Lord assures us that everything will be alright.

Peace be still. 

G.K.

It is easy to make someone leave the Church

Okay, I am not trying to suggest a way for member of the church to kick out those who are interested in the gospel, but rather, I would like to discuss something that we have been always doing, but not realizing that the things that we do would probably influence a person to leave the church.

As Mormons, we are knee on sharing our belief to others, “to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places…” (Mosiah 18:9). Undeniably missionary work has a high priority in many LDS members’ lives as the prophets and apostles have constantly reminded us the importance of it. Many members share the gospel to friends, families, and neighbours enthusiastically with a hope that these people will join the church someday. However, we often neglect the feeling of the investigators and impose our ideologies onto them.

When I say “members often neglect the feeling of the investigators”, I am referring to the way we see these people, we see them as object. I sound a bit overgeneralizing, but from my observation, the way members treat investigators are quite systematic – systematic in a way that members have a set of formula on how to treat these people. The formula goes like this: investigators come to church à we befriend them with a purpose to help them to get baptized à the investigators have doubt (it’s okay and normal to have doubt, don’t you think?) à we use every fibre of our soul to counsel them and tell them that getting baptized is the only way out. The result is, either these people stop investigating the church (members are upset, the friend link is broken, and some might even think that these investigators are influenced by Satan) or getting baptized but later on leave the church because they feel they are being forced to do so. Does it sound familiar to you?

So, what about imposing our ideologies? Members often are very kind to introduce, not just the doctrine and the gospel, but also the Mormon culture to the newbies. Even though I am not a newbies anymore, but sometimes I still have this feeling that people are trying to tell me that “THIS IS THE WAY HOW YOU SHOULD LIVE AS A MORMON”, the worst is what these people say is not necessary related to the gospel and it’s just their way of life. Come on, the way you live as a Mormon is not the way how I want to be as a Mormon. Keeping commandments are not always easy for the new comer. So, please please please STOP telling investigators how they should live their lives and what choices they should make, rather, please nourish them with the word of God and let them make the choices and be responsible to themselves.

I am a convert to the Church and I am truly grateful for the missionaries who taught me and the fellow shippers who are genuine, kind, understanding and the most important, they let me be who I am. Those who are interested in the Church, and those new members, deserve the right to figure out for themselves the way they should be. They all, if desire, have the ability to find a personal way to communicate with God. Our roles, as members of the church, should be their sincere friends and show genuine supports no matter what their choices are. They deserve to be treated at PEOPLE, not OBJECT. 

G.K.

Trust in the Lord

This morning I had a very strong, distinct impression not to post
what I have already written but to share what I have been
learning in the past 6 months. It is extremely personal and I try
share it as discreetly as possible. I hope it will stimulate your
thinking and understand trust from an eternal perspective.

Four months ago, I had to make a very difficult decision
resolving a dilemma. I was super happy and excited feeling it
was a sheer bliss until the Lord’s will led me to a different turn.
So, I dropped it and went on with life but that didn’t feel right
either. After 4 months of tossing and turning at night, I once
again come up with a new solution and finally feel at peace.

Well, as difficult as the situation seems, my growth has been
tremendous and I begin to see the skills, attributes I’ve
developed over time. Sometimes I think of answers to prayers
like a light bulb, very “answerish”, but this is different. I cried
(many many times), thought through every possible solution,
and in the end chose to act upon my best judgment then
patiently waited for the confirmation.

It took a whole 4 months to regain my inner peace but
meanwhile some great friends’ care has become the an aid, a
perfect answer to my prayers. Heavenly Father keeps sending
friends whom I trust and can confide in to check on me. These
conversations have given me much comfort and inspired me to
take the leap of faith.

The exact direction I was hoping to receive never came.
The sacrifice I knew I had to make still needs to be made.

The unknown future remains uncertain.

But I’ve gained something far more valuable.

I’ve learned that courage means staying calm to work things out
when every bit of my fear tells me to jump ship.

I’ve learned that the use of agency requires me being
dependent and independent on the Lord.

I’ve learned that faith, hope, and charity are like a tripod and I
can’t just pick one to have.

I’ve learned that having faith and trust in the Lord doesn’t mean
knowing all the possible outcomes but following even if I can’t
see.

“It is not easy to go without—without physical gratifications or
spiritual assurances or material possessions—but sometimes we
must since there is no guarantee of convenience written into
our Christian covenant. We must work hard and do right, as
Abraham Lincoln said, and sometimes our chance will come.
And when we’ve tried, really tried, and waited for what seemed
never to be ours, then “the angels came and ministered unto
him.”” – Elder Jeffrey R. Holland


K.D.

Degenderizing Priesthood

Few weeks ago Danise’s article touched on feminism, Mormon women, priesthood and equality. I would also like to add on to her article and share my view, particularly on priesthood.

What is priesthood?

This is from the Church official explanation:

The priesthood is the eternal power and authority of God. Through the priesthood God created and governs the heavens and the earth. Through this power He redeems and exalts His children, bringing to pass "the immortality and eternal life of man" (Moses 1:39). God gives priesthood authority to worthy male members of the Church so they can act in His name for the salvation of His children. Priesthood holders can be authorized to preach the gospel, administer the ordinances of salvation, and govern the kingdom of God on the earth.

It is simple and direct.

So… why men holding priesthood is controversial?

The answer is simple and direct too: it is because MEN are holding the PRIESTHOOD. Both “men” and “women” are problematic words because they contain hidden stereotypical definitions. The society and our unconscious mind connect “men” to authority, power, domination, patriarch, and phallocrat. As for now, only men in the Church are ordained priesthood. In this way, we “genderize” priesthood by the social norm of gender specification and by looking at it in a worldly manner. It is not fair to apply this social norm to those faithful and righteous men who hold the priesthood. As feminists we also fight for gender equality for men. However, there are cases that priesthood men out there use priesthood in a manipulative way, in connection to their cultural and social background. This adds negative connotation to the word “priesthood”. Using priesthood in a manipulative way is abominable in the eyes of God (D&C 121).

Is it vital and important for women to be ordained the priesthood?

I personally think that working towards salvation and exaltation are far more important than worrying who gets what from God and who doesn't. Priesthood is the power from God enabling us to receive necessary ordinances in order to return to His presence. We should “degenderize” our way of thinking towards priesthood and focus on the importance of priesthood regarding to salvation and exaltation.

In my personal opinion, I don’t think priesthood is something that we need to fight for or petition for. There are things that is not revealed unto us at this particular time. However, an advice to the brethren: Please do not use the “I-am-a-priesthood-holder-because-I-am-a-man” attitude. Also, an advice to the sisters: Please stop whining “why women can’t hold the priesthood”! Let us all remember that “we have been made instrument in the hands of God to bring about this great work” (Alma 26:3), no matter who we are, male or female.

G.K.

Broken Hearts to Mend

Elder Holland’s Conference remark has powerfully addressed the myths of
mental illness particularly in depression. Thank you for those of you who
have shot me messages giving me heads up to watch Elder Holland’s talk!
Our discussions have sparked up so many inspiring ideas and I just
constantly walk around town with the silliest smile recapping them in my
mind.

In his talk, Elder Holland extended a metaphor from the Savior’s
experience in the Garden of Gethsemane. “If the bitter cup does not pass,
drink it.” It is a reality check countering the myth that applying the
atonement = pain free, now.

“Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you
rest _a. “Many today interpret rest as the absence of trouble, heartache,
pain, and sadness in this life. This misguided belief has once taken a toll
on me with all the injustice, cruelty I saw in my own life and the world.

Carlfred Borderick, a psychologist and former stake president, wrote
about his daring move while presiding at a stake primary and young
women activity _b. The Barbie and Ken looking leaders were teaching the
audience that they would become like them with the perfect looking
eternal happy family if they too kept the commandments. President
Borderick boldly taught the girls that he wouldn’t want them to believe it
for one minute. The atonement and the gospel were not meant to be
insurance against pain but resources to deal with it.  

Through his experience, he has learned that some of us have chosen to be
born or live in extremely difficult situations in order to accomplish the
work and grand purposes of God. In one of the example, it was a scenario
where a faithful sister could be destroyed by her love yet she faithfully
fulfilled the task she has chosen.

But what if we feel so broken because of the difficulties we’ve
encountered? What if we feel that we are “damage good” because of
missed opportunities, incapability? Even though we have or have been
chosen to go through these excruciating trials, how about the loss that
comes with such sacrifices? In his last conference talk, Elder Joseph B.
Wirthlin taught about the principle of compensation _c. “The Lord
compensates the faithful for every loss. That which is taken away from
those who love the Lord will be added unto them in His own way. While it
may not come at the time we desire, the faithful will know that every tear
today will eventually be returned a hundredfold with tears of rejoicing and
gratitude.”

At one point of my mission, I needed a blessing of comfort as I was
struggling to cope with a lost that I couldn’t comprehend in addition to
existing difficult circumstances. To his greatest effort, my awesome
Peruvian district leader, Elder Pacheco, offered the blessing in English
instead of his mother tongue, Spanish. Despite how difficult and tragic the
lost was, he ensured me that “Heavenly Father has prepared a way for me
to be happy.” So I held on to that promise trusting His way to be a better way. 

Four years later, what seemingly to be a tragic lost has now led to
wonderful blessings altering the course of my life. I would not trade what
I have now with what I have lost, not in a million years. In the moment of
insecurity, heartache and heartbreak, may we trust in healing power of
the atonement and with the utmost assurance believing that experience is
for our benefit in the Master’s plan.

Be still, and know that I am God. - Psalm 46:10

K.D.

A. Matt 11:28

B. http://rusch.files.wordpress.com/2006/09/the-uses-of-adversity.pdf

C. http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2008/10/come-what-may-and-love-it?lang=eng

Can the Atonement Heal Mental Illness?

Let’s admit it. The stigma of mental illness is real.  Over the years, I
have watched some love ones, close friends, and clients struggling
and repeatedly asked, “If the heal power of the atonement is real,
why am I still sick?”  So, forgive me if I go all ballistic and have a
soapbox episode in church meetings, or here on the blog. It’s too
close to home and I want those who have been reaching out will
get appropriate help.

The question here isn’t challenging the power of priesthood
blessings in connection with miraculous healings. I believe that it
happens according to God’s will and individual’s faith (Bible
Dictionary, prayer). However, the underling concern here is as if
spiritual healing is the primary or even sole option for treating
mental illness.

The factors are so tangled and let’s connect them with a help
professional for the best solution.  Come on, will you tell a buddy
who has been barely diagnosed with cancer to just pray for spiritual
strength? Absolutely no!! Then why say that to a person with
depression?  

The trick about mental illness is that the cause can be
psychological / developmental then creating physiologically
changes. These changes enhance or magnify the psychological
symptoms turning to a vicious cycle.  We will be totally jumping the
gun if we direct anyone to any other resources (special diets,
meditation, religious healings, etc…). Even for us who have
received training to assess and intervene take hours or even
multiple sessions to figure out how and what to help.

The Church has actively taken precaution to psychoeducate its
multi-national members due to varies cultural conceptions on
mental illness. We now have a training packet for new missionaries,
resourceful booklets for leaders including mission presidents.
Additional resources can also be found on the Church website
as you search for “mental illness.”

For those who bravely face it day by day or have overcome it, I
salute you! Your true understanding of the atonement stands as a
monument of faith and we are grateful for your valiant example .

Next week, we’ll dedicate the post to you who have experienced
traumatic events, excruciating trails including mental illness, and
injustice circumstances discussing on how the healing of the atonement takes
place. If you have come across any great quotes, stories during
General Conference, you are more than welcome to share it with us.

PS: Check out this article by Elder Alexander B. Morrison, of the
Seventy, and see how well you know about mental illness.

http://www.lds.org/ensign/2005/10/myths-about-mental-
illness?lang=eng

K.D.